I really love where music is going these days. I had to wait through too many years of screechy boy band rock and now almost every new band sounds good to me. (slight exxageration). But as I start to think of my 2012 Best of Playlist, there are a few contenders from this month alone.
OoOo bu Oberhofer
Get Away With It by Animal Kingdom
Change by Churchill
Champion by The Chevin
All I Want by Kodaline
Wild by Royal Teeth
RadioActive by Imagine Dragons
Global Concepts by Robert DeLong
True Romance by Citizens
Brother by Matt Corby
One Day by Asaf Avidan
She by Laura Mvula
Put the Gun Down by ZZ Ward
Yeahs by Alesso
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Friday, November 9, 2012
Happy Anniversary to Me
Today is my 11th wedding anniversary, yet I will not be celebrating it. On March 18th of this year I learned that Joe had been speaking with a divorce lawyer for nearly a month and wanted a divorce. I was completely blindsided. He still told me he loved me, called me his best friend who "knew him better than everyone" and kissed me good bye every morning, even the morning that I accidentally found out.
I could never have predicted the utter heartbreak and sadness that I felt. I called in sick to work, spending three days sitting in my bed sobbing. I just felt so very, very sad. I was hurt, worried, scared but mostly very, very sad. The Friday night I started packing to move out, a mere 5 days after my world turned upside down, I honestly, to my core did not think I could make it through.
My friends and family rallied and came to my rescue. They came bearing gifts of chocolate, beer, sleeping aids and french fries. They came and listened, and some came and talked, knowing the distraction was what I needed to remember that I will be OK and yes, life does go on despite a wounded heart. I will never be able to thank my core group of friends that were there for me that first week, giving in ways I never expected and can never repay. When I think of where I am today, it is due to the outpouring of love and support that I felt that first week. In fact, as I spent the first night in my parents' home, I went to sleep feeling more loved than ever.
It's been a tough 7 months, but each month has gotten easier in some way and there has been a lot of good and fun that has happened. I can tell I am healing, working through the pain, hurt and grief. I have learned a lot about myself and a lot about other people. I went to Ireland, a place I never would have gone with Joe, and had a fantastic time. I have developed friendships with people and done things I only used to wish I could do. I made a "Can Do Check List" and have been steadily working through it.
I loved being married to Joe. He was my best friend and through the 20 years we were together we were able to grow up, find out who we were as people, with a wonderful safety net of each other to catch us when we stumbled. I am a strong, independent and assertive person right now because I always felt that he loved me no matter how silly, stupid or bitchy I was. I will forever be thankful to him for that. I will always love him and I hope that at some point he can find happiness. To be very cliche, we had a great love story filled with lots of laughs, but that is over and now it is time for the next fantastic book of my life.
I will never be able to appropriately thank my parents for all that they have done for me over this time. They showed up at 10pm on that most horrible Friday night and just stood and held me as I cried. At the exact time they should be enjoying their retirement, they let me and my bird move into their home, clearing out closets and having dinner ready for me every night. They supported when I needed and gave me space without me ever having to ask. I quite literally could not have gotten through this without them.
I also have to thank a small handful of friends who have really gone above and beyond the call of friendship duty. From talking me down off the crazy train, giving me a safe place to cry or simply being there to share a funny story or latest silly me adventure, I truly know the importance of a good support system and feel incredibly lucky to say I have a great one. I remember my mom walking in late that horrible night while I was sobbing. I just said "I can't do this by myself." My mom just held me and said "Oh honey, no one expected you to except you." I did expect to be able to do it alone. Now I know that was foolish to even consider not leaning on people that love me when I needed it the most.
So for the first time in 20 years, I am on my own. I am living by myself for the first time ever (and so far love it!). I have a great group of friends and despite the year not being at all what I planned, I am doing pretty well. Take out the hurt and pain, and our separation becomes a business transaction. Any decision that had to be made I tried to think of what the me in 10 years would think. I've said from the beginning I want to handle this with as much grace and dignity as possible, and I honestly think I am doing a good job with that, or at least the best that I can.
I really hope that November 9 becomes just a day, that I will at one point not even realize it was my anniversary. But I also hope that when I do realize it is my anniversary, I can look back fondly on it, think about how happy I was that day, with the rainbow over my head, friends and family surrounding me. Because I was happy; but now it is time for me to be happier.
I could never have predicted the utter heartbreak and sadness that I felt. I called in sick to work, spending three days sitting in my bed sobbing. I just felt so very, very sad. I was hurt, worried, scared but mostly very, very sad. The Friday night I started packing to move out, a mere 5 days after my world turned upside down, I honestly, to my core did not think I could make it through.
My friends and family rallied and came to my rescue. They came bearing gifts of chocolate, beer, sleeping aids and french fries. They came and listened, and some came and talked, knowing the distraction was what I needed to remember that I will be OK and yes, life does go on despite a wounded heart. I will never be able to thank my core group of friends that were there for me that first week, giving in ways I never expected and can never repay. When I think of where I am today, it is due to the outpouring of love and support that I felt that first week. In fact, as I spent the first night in my parents' home, I went to sleep feeling more loved than ever.
It's been a tough 7 months, but each month has gotten easier in some way and there has been a lot of good and fun that has happened. I can tell I am healing, working through the pain, hurt and grief. I have learned a lot about myself and a lot about other people. I went to Ireland, a place I never would have gone with Joe, and had a fantastic time. I have developed friendships with people and done things I only used to wish I could do. I made a "Can Do Check List" and have been steadily working through it.
I loved being married to Joe. He was my best friend and through the 20 years we were together we were able to grow up, find out who we were as people, with a wonderful safety net of each other to catch us when we stumbled. I am a strong, independent and assertive person right now because I always felt that he loved me no matter how silly, stupid or bitchy I was. I will forever be thankful to him for that. I will always love him and I hope that at some point he can find happiness. To be very cliche, we had a great love story filled with lots of laughs, but that is over and now it is time for the next fantastic book of my life.
I will never be able to appropriately thank my parents for all that they have done for me over this time. They showed up at 10pm on that most horrible Friday night and just stood and held me as I cried. At the exact time they should be enjoying their retirement, they let me and my bird move into their home, clearing out closets and having dinner ready for me every night. They supported when I needed and gave me space without me ever having to ask. I quite literally could not have gotten through this without them.
I also have to thank a small handful of friends who have really gone above and beyond the call of friendship duty. From talking me down off the crazy train, giving me a safe place to cry or simply being there to share a funny story or latest silly me adventure, I truly know the importance of a good support system and feel incredibly lucky to say I have a great one. I remember my mom walking in late that horrible night while I was sobbing. I just said "I can't do this by myself." My mom just held me and said "Oh honey, no one expected you to except you." I did expect to be able to do it alone. Now I know that was foolish to even consider not leaning on people that love me when I needed it the most.
So for the first time in 20 years, I am on my own. I am living by myself for the first time ever (and so far love it!). I have a great group of friends and despite the year not being at all what I planned, I am doing pretty well. Take out the hurt and pain, and our separation becomes a business transaction. Any decision that had to be made I tried to think of what the me in 10 years would think. I've said from the beginning I want to handle this with as much grace and dignity as possible, and I honestly think I am doing a good job with that, or at least the best that I can.
I really hope that November 9 becomes just a day, that I will at one point not even realize it was my anniversary. But I also hope that when I do realize it is my anniversary, I can look back fondly on it, think about how happy I was that day, with the rainbow over my head, friends and family surrounding me. Because I was happy; but now it is time for me to be happier.
Thursday, October 18, 2012
In Defense of a Hero
Lance Armstrong stepped down as CEO from the Lance Armstrong Foundation and soon after Nike as well as Budweiser ended their relationships with him, with more to come. I have spent all afternoon watching various tweets centered around his guilt, telling jokes (What is Lance's favorite animal? A Cheetah) and generally jumping on the "We Hate Lance" bandwagon. Not me.
I still am a Lance supporter and there are two main reasons why.
I remember watching Lance's first Tour de France and while at the time I knew very little about the sport, I was rooting for this guy, this AMERICAN, who just 3 years after having cancer was winning the grueling 23 day long road race. I cried when he won. I have always had a bike and can remember as a kid just taking off and riding for hours just to explore. As a "grown up", I realized I missed my bike and started riding again. I wasn't the only one, as road biking suddenly became a topic of conversation and wearing spandex and riding on skinny tires was cool again.
Lance won again the next year and the next year and of course the next year and by then I was riding pretty steadily. I devoured his book "It's Not About The Bike." I remember thinking that he is an x-man in the real world. His body processes oxygen at a higher rate than most people while producing less lactic acid than most. His spine is shaped in a way that makes him more aerodynamic. He simply is able to tolerate more physical stress than most people. He also seems like a complete and total asshole.
Yep, you read that correctly. He is an asshole. But I also think that he had to be to get through what he did and to continuously win like he did. The Tour de France is an incredibly impossible race to even complete. Each year there are multiple wrecks and even deaths. You simply cannot just decide one day to ride the Tour without any preparation. It takes years of training, days of riding in the rain, the cold, the hot and riding when the last thing you want to do is to ride. You have to fine tune your nutrition, focus everything in your life around one goal. I have done one thing like this in my life that is even remotely close and that was run a marathon. I had to sacrifice parties, time with friends, dinners, ice cream, sleeping in and generally a life. I hurt, all the time, and spent most weekends on the couch with ice packs on various parts of my body. I did all that for a sub par finish that is not even remotely close to what Lance could do.
I firmly believe that there are people that are naturally athletic and I am not one of those people, but Lance is. He is able to train to a level I never could dream of hitting. But the key piece of that statement is that he trained. He did the work. He put in the miles and miles and miles. He made the sacrifices. He prepared his body, his mind and his team for stresses they could never imagine.
I don't think anyone can deny that Lance Armstrong is more than a person, he is a brand. His name is synonymous with the Livestrong logo that graces the yellow bands, t-shirts, bikes, hats, bags and cycling gear, seen at most races, sporting events and in any large crowd of people. That brand has raised more than $470 million to support and empower people who are affected by cancer. The Lance Armstrong Foundation has helped more than 550 organizations and countless thousands of thousands of people who have cancer. More than that, Lance has given HOPE to people who have cancer. He has revolutionized how people look at cancer. Instead of being a victim, Lance inspired people to fight, to take charge, to not surrender to the disease. Livestrong is an immense resource center for people diagnosed with cancer, but Lance changed the status quo of those people. Cancer is no longer a death sentence. Lance was able to fight cancer and come back to win the hardest road race in the world because he chose to fight. He was the first person to say that a person with cancer can live.
Livestrong is about the fight. It is about learning about the disease and living strong. It is about acceptance of the fear, the anger, and working through all the emotions that a cancer patient and their support system are about to feel. It is about living a life and having a life worth living. Lance Armstrong showed people that you can live after being diagnosed with cancer. His strength gave others strength.
For me, he will always be the person who got me back on my bike, and for that I thank him. Because of that I have met people that have helped me along in journeys I never knew I would be on. The person I was 10 years ago has fundamentally changed, due mostly in part to my ability to ride my bike. More importantly, Lance is still the person who changed our society's opinions on cancer. We fight. We don't accept less than living.
I don't know the details on the doping scheme, I don't know if he was simply using his own oxygenated blood or steroids. I don't know if he was the only one or if everyone was doing it. What I do know is it is impossible to finish the Tour de France without putting in the work. I know that he helped many friends of mine learn about their cancer and be better prepared legally, financially and mentally. I know that in the pros and cons of life, he has done far more for society as a whole than most people can ever dream about. He had cancer. He fought and he won; continues to fight. He taught all of us that we can also fight and win. And for me, that is why I will always be a Lance fan.
I still am a Lance supporter and there are two main reasons why.
I remember watching Lance's first Tour de France and while at the time I knew very little about the sport, I was rooting for this guy, this AMERICAN, who just 3 years after having cancer was winning the grueling 23 day long road race. I cried when he won. I have always had a bike and can remember as a kid just taking off and riding for hours just to explore. As a "grown up", I realized I missed my bike and started riding again. I wasn't the only one, as road biking suddenly became a topic of conversation and wearing spandex and riding on skinny tires was cool again.
Lance won again the next year and the next year and of course the next year and by then I was riding pretty steadily. I devoured his book "It's Not About The Bike." I remember thinking that he is an x-man in the real world. His body processes oxygen at a higher rate than most people while producing less lactic acid than most. His spine is shaped in a way that makes him more aerodynamic. He simply is able to tolerate more physical stress than most people. He also seems like a complete and total asshole.
Yep, you read that correctly. He is an asshole. But I also think that he had to be to get through what he did and to continuously win like he did. The Tour de France is an incredibly impossible race to even complete. Each year there are multiple wrecks and even deaths. You simply cannot just decide one day to ride the Tour without any preparation. It takes years of training, days of riding in the rain, the cold, the hot and riding when the last thing you want to do is to ride. You have to fine tune your nutrition, focus everything in your life around one goal. I have done one thing like this in my life that is even remotely close and that was run a marathon. I had to sacrifice parties, time with friends, dinners, ice cream, sleeping in and generally a life. I hurt, all the time, and spent most weekends on the couch with ice packs on various parts of my body. I did all that for a sub par finish that is not even remotely close to what Lance could do.
I firmly believe that there are people that are naturally athletic and I am not one of those people, but Lance is. He is able to train to a level I never could dream of hitting. But the key piece of that statement is that he trained. He did the work. He put in the miles and miles and miles. He made the sacrifices. He prepared his body, his mind and his team for stresses they could never imagine.
I don't think anyone can deny that Lance Armstrong is more than a person, he is a brand. His name is synonymous with the Livestrong logo that graces the yellow bands, t-shirts, bikes, hats, bags and cycling gear, seen at most races, sporting events and in any large crowd of people. That brand has raised more than $470 million to support and empower people who are affected by cancer. The Lance Armstrong Foundation has helped more than 550 organizations and countless thousands of thousands of people who have cancer. More than that, Lance has given HOPE to people who have cancer. He has revolutionized how people look at cancer. Instead of being a victim, Lance inspired people to fight, to take charge, to not surrender to the disease. Livestrong is an immense resource center for people diagnosed with cancer, but Lance changed the status quo of those people. Cancer is no longer a death sentence. Lance was able to fight cancer and come back to win the hardest road race in the world because he chose to fight. He was the first person to say that a person with cancer can live.
Livestrong is about the fight. It is about learning about the disease and living strong. It is about acceptance of the fear, the anger, and working through all the emotions that a cancer patient and their support system are about to feel. It is about living a life and having a life worth living. Lance Armstrong showed people that you can live after being diagnosed with cancer. His strength gave others strength.
For me, he will always be the person who got me back on my bike, and for that I thank him. Because of that I have met people that have helped me along in journeys I never knew I would be on. The person I was 10 years ago has fundamentally changed, due mostly in part to my ability to ride my bike. More importantly, Lance is still the person who changed our society's opinions on cancer. We fight. We don't accept less than living.
I don't know the details on the doping scheme, I don't know if he was simply using his own oxygenated blood or steroids. I don't know if he was the only one or if everyone was doing it. What I do know is it is impossible to finish the Tour de France without putting in the work. I know that he helped many friends of mine learn about their cancer and be better prepared legally, financially and mentally. I know that in the pros and cons of life, he has done far more for society as a whole than most people can ever dream about. He had cancer. He fought and he won; continues to fight. He taught all of us that we can also fight and win. And for me, that is why I will always be a Lance fan.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
September Music
Teenage Icon by The Vaccines
Something Good by Alt-J
Ayla by The Maccabees
Bom Bom by Sam and The Womp
Read All About It by Emeli Sande
Flaws by Bastille
Talk Through The Night by Dog is Dead
Madness by Muse
Two Fingers by Jake Bugg
Music Notes this Month:
I have been very fortunate this month to see a lot of concerts and with each one I was reminded how much I love music and how important it is in my life. I am constantly amazed with peoples' talent, especially since I myself have none. Sitting in a room listening to a great singer still gives me chills and I vividly remember some performances that have brought me to tears. So even though many of these really messed up my sleep schedule, here are some highlights from my month of music:
A Silent Film - This band has long been on my radar, included in best of lists since April of 2009. So I was really excited when they were announced to play a work event. Their songs are pretty and the lyrics are mostly sad, which is a trait that for some reason I really like. Like most music I really like, hardly anyone was familiar with the band which is a shame. In person they were humble, sweet and very appreciative of people actually singing their lyrics. Two of my favorites: You Will Leave a Mark and Driven By Their Beating Hearts.
Metric: This band has been around for a bit and their songs are played pretty consistently on the station that I listen to the most, Atl Nation. I've never really loved them, never hated them. Then I saw them in an acoustic performance and I was amazed. The lead singer's voice is pure and beautiful and it has forever changed how I think of their music. You will probably recognize Youth Without Youth.
Something Good by Alt-J
Ayla by The Maccabees
Bom Bom by Sam and The Womp
Read All About It by Emeli Sande
Flaws by Bastille
Talk Through The Night by Dog is Dead
Madness by Muse
Two Fingers by Jake Bugg
Music Notes this Month:
I have been very fortunate this month to see a lot of concerts and with each one I was reminded how much I love music and how important it is in my life. I am constantly amazed with peoples' talent, especially since I myself have none. Sitting in a room listening to a great singer still gives me chills and I vividly remember some performances that have brought me to tears. So even though many of these really messed up my sleep schedule, here are some highlights from my month of music:
A Silent Film - This band has long been on my radar, included in best of lists since April of 2009. So I was really excited when they were announced to play a work event. Their songs are pretty and the lyrics are mostly sad, which is a trait that for some reason I really like. Like most music I really like, hardly anyone was familiar with the band which is a shame. In person they were humble, sweet and very appreciative of people actually singing their lyrics. Two of my favorites: You Will Leave a Mark and Driven By Their Beating Hearts.
Metric: This band has been around for a bit and their songs are played pretty consistently on the station that I listen to the most, Atl Nation. I've never really loved them, never hated them. Then I saw them in an acoustic performance and I was amazed. The lead singer's voice is pure and beautiful and it has forever changed how I think of their music. You will probably recognize Youth Without Youth.
The Wombats: This band peaked my interest a few years ago with their song "Let's Dance to Joy Division" because it is a good song and I love that they get the irony of that line. It made me laugh. So I have been following them, purchasing all of their stuff and would consider myself a fan. Their newest single Jump Into the Fog addresses a woman as "love" (which I LOVE and want) and also has a great lines: "I'm only here because I want to twist the structure of my average day" and "life tastes sweeter when its wrapped in debauchery". So I was more than a little excited to see they were coming to Charlotte and that they would be coming to work. I was the only one that I work with that even knew who they were! Now I see a lot of bands come through work, some big and some small. Some do a great job interacting with the crowd and then there are bands like The Wombats. They walked onto the platform, hardly said hello, unceremoniously sang two songs (the usual is three) and walked off stage. That's it. I was very disappointed. For a band with such a sense of humor in their lyrics, to have no personality whatsoever was not what I expected. I went to the show that night and they were better, but still they have lost a bit of their appeal. I still like the music, but I will never again skip down the hall at work exclaiming "The Wombats are here!" Check out one of my favorites, Tokyo.
Morning Parade: I liked this band's first major hit and since they were opening for the Wombats, they also came by work. They were the first band in the 16 years I have worked here that wore a sports coat. They also smelled good, a rarity. They did the normal introduction, sang a song and then said they wanted to play a game with the audience members. It was hilarious! They sang another song and when it came to the next break they chose me. Steve, the lead singer introduced himself to me and asked the question, then played their hit song. We took pictures and that was it. That night at the concert I bought a cd and went up to get it autographed. He looked at me and right away said 'Hi Amy, so glad to see you again!". How awesome is that?! We chatted, he said he'd be around afterwards and asked if I'd stay for a drink. I was there with Shelia, so we both stayed and she bought the band a round of drinks. I hung out and talked with Steve while The Wombats were playing. He had been touring with them for a few weeks and said that they are funny and nice. He also said he was so impressed that the Wombats were playing in a small venue here when just two weeks ago they were playing to a sold out 50,000 crowd in the UK. I asked him if that was disheartening and he said quite the opposite...that it was inspiring to be with a band that loved performing and loved the music so much. So Steve bought me two drinks, we hung out talking for about an hour. I am pretty sure we are best friends now. :) But seriously, they will be back in Charlotte in November. Go see them; they are a group of nice guys with a lot of talent. Headlights is great, but this Us & Ourselves is my favorite.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
New Music Update
It's been awhile...I am already worried that I haven't tracked enough music to properly compile my Amy's Audibles for 2012. But better late than never. Here are the songs I am loving lately:
Is Your Love Big Enough by Lianne LaHavas
Day You Die by Walk the Moon
No Hope by The Vaccines
Under the Westway by Blur
Savage by Hacienda *
Ho Hey by the Lumineres *
Let's Go by Matt and Kim
Little Black Submarines by Black Keys
Nice to Be Alive by Ball Park Music
All of Me by Tanlines
At Home by Crystal Fighters
Old Pine by Ben Howard
We'll Be Coming Back by Calvin Harris and Example
Forest Whittaker by Bad Books *
No Tell by Smoke & Jackal
Female Robbery by Neighborhood
Handshake by Two Door Cinema Club
Is Your Love Big Enough by Lianne LaHavas
Day You Die by Walk the Moon
No Hope by The Vaccines
Under the Westway by Blur
Savage by Hacienda *
Ho Hey by the Lumineres *
Let's Go by Matt and Kim
Little Black Submarines by Black Keys
Nice to Be Alive by Ball Park Music
All of Me by Tanlines
At Home by Crystal Fighters
Old Pine by Ben Howard
We'll Be Coming Back by Calvin Harris and Example
Forest Whittaker by Bad Books *
No Tell by Smoke & Jackal
Female Robbery by Neighborhood
Handshake by Two Door Cinema Club
Wee Little Recap
I never planned on going to Ireland and would have lived my life happily without. But the opportunity arose and I went, feeling a need I couldn't explain, to do something unplanned. I am so glad I did.
Ireland is gorgeous country which made me think of rural Pennsylvania where my grandparents live. Rolling hills fill the landscape and there is no way to count the many shades of green. There is rain, lots and lots of rain, so you might think that it is a grey place, but the opposite is true. Everything is so lush and the flowers are amazingly vibrant. The purples seems richer, blues brighter, the reds and pinks pop out like none I've seen before. Houses are painted brightly as well, at the very least have colorful window frames. Castle ruins are mere feet from the roads, which themselves are skinny, crumbling and have you wondering how in the world two cars could ever pass at the same time (the answer: one cars pulls over in the hedge). It seems you are never far away from the coast and it is so scenic the effect is calming and serene.
We left Ireland on a rainy and grey day, typical considering the week. The drive from Northern Ireland to Dublin was easy and we made great time. We had an uneventful RyanAir trip back to London, grabbed a cab and made our way to the hotel about an hour north of the city. The plan was to check in, drop off our stuff and head into London. However, things close early on Sundays, and by things, I mean restaurants and shops. Since both Dearlsey and I had been to the city, and Beth was about to spend a month there, we decided to walk down to the little town near our hotel. We found a little pub and were delighted to learn that they do stay open. We sat outside, drank, laughed, drank some more and ate whatever we wanted. It was another unplanned, but delightfully wonderful afternoon. I had brought my camera and took some of my favorite pictures on the walk back. Exhausted, we were all in bed and asleep by 9.
I have been such a planner my entire life. I have 6 month plans, 2 year, 5 year, 10 year plans. I have spreadsheets upon spreadsheets of different options so I can make a decision about a possible plan. I have airport codes, budgets and potential hotels for vacations I want to do in 5 years. Traveling is very important to me and that is something I can't see changing. But this trip wasn't planned. I didn't save for years. I didn't even really know some of the people I travelled with, meeting one for the first time a month before we left. I didn't have a budget, didn't stick to one, still don't quite know how I am going to pay for the trip. But Everything Worked Out. We all got along. I didn't spend as much as I thought I would. I laughed. I had a great time and I felt more like me than I have in a long time. I enjoyed the experience, even though it wasn't perfect. One of my favorite parts of the trip was standing out in the cold, wind and rain looking at a rock that is thousands of years old. It was something I would have never done before. I would have wanted to, but I wouldn't have done it. This time I did. I stopped often and took loads of pictures. I stayed up all night talking, something I haven't done since I was a teenager. This unplanned trip was just what I needed to remind myself that Everything Works Out. It really does. Sometimes it doesn't work out like it was planned, but that doesn't mean it can't be just as good, and if you are open to it, it might just be better.
So to Ireland, thank you for being such a life changing place for me. Thank you to the people of Ireland for being warm, open, friendly and accepting. Thank you to my travel partners who reminded me that the world is open to me, and that I am going to be alright. Everything Works Out.
Ireland is gorgeous country which made me think of rural Pennsylvania where my grandparents live. Rolling hills fill the landscape and there is no way to count the many shades of green. There is rain, lots and lots of rain, so you might think that it is a grey place, but the opposite is true. Everything is so lush and the flowers are amazingly vibrant. The purples seems richer, blues brighter, the reds and pinks pop out like none I've seen before. Houses are painted brightly as well, at the very least have colorful window frames. Castle ruins are mere feet from the roads, which themselves are skinny, crumbling and have you wondering how in the world two cars could ever pass at the same time (the answer: one cars pulls over in the hedge). It seems you are never far away from the coast and it is so scenic the effect is calming and serene.
We left Ireland on a rainy and grey day, typical considering the week. The drive from Northern Ireland to Dublin was easy and we made great time. We had an uneventful RyanAir trip back to London, grabbed a cab and made our way to the hotel about an hour north of the city. The plan was to check in, drop off our stuff and head into London. However, things close early on Sundays, and by things, I mean restaurants and shops. Since both Dearlsey and I had been to the city, and Beth was about to spend a month there, we decided to walk down to the little town near our hotel. We found a little pub and were delighted to learn that they do stay open. We sat outside, drank, laughed, drank some more and ate whatever we wanted. It was another unplanned, but delightfully wonderful afternoon. I had brought my camera and took some of my favorite pictures on the walk back. Exhausted, we were all in bed and asleep by 9. 
I have been such a planner my entire life. I have 6 month plans, 2 year, 5 year, 10 year plans. I have spreadsheets upon spreadsheets of different options so I can make a decision about a possible plan. I have airport codes, budgets and potential hotels for vacations I want to do in 5 years. Traveling is very important to me and that is something I can't see changing. But this trip wasn't planned. I didn't save for years. I didn't even really know some of the people I travelled with, meeting one for the first time a month before we left. I didn't have a budget, didn't stick to one, still don't quite know how I am going to pay for the trip. But Everything Worked Out. We all got along. I didn't spend as much as I thought I would. I laughed. I had a great time and I felt more like me than I have in a long time. I enjoyed the experience, even though it wasn't perfect. One of my favorite parts of the trip was standing out in the cold, wind and rain looking at a rock that is thousands of years old. It was something I would have never done before. I would have wanted to, but I wouldn't have done it. This time I did. I stopped often and took loads of pictures. I stayed up all night talking, something I haven't done since I was a teenager. This unplanned trip was just what I needed to remind myself that Everything Works Out. It really does. Sometimes it doesn't work out like it was planned, but that doesn't mean it can't be just as good, and if you are open to it, it might just be better. 
So to Ireland, thank you for being such a life changing place for me. Thank you to the people of Ireland for being warm, open, friendly and accepting. Thank you to my travel partners who reminded me that the world is open to me, and that I am going to be alright. Everything Works Out. Friday, August 3, 2012
Big Bad Belfast...Blog Post or History Lesson...You Decide.
Honestly, I didn't know a lot about the whole Northern Ireland/Republic of Ireland conflict when I planned the trip to Ireland. We knew we wanted to see Giant's Causeway in Northern Ireland and since we were up that way, I knew I wanted to check out the Titanic Museum in Belfast. Even though I didn't have the specifics, there was an inherent danger to the North and specifically Belfast. I researched where it was OK to be Catholic, where I shouldn't say a word. I registered with the State Department in case "Something Bad" should happen. I was expecting bombings, or at least buildings that had been recently bombed. This was Belfast after all, home of The Troubles, the IRA and Other Bad Things.
So on our way to Northern Ireland, I read up on the issue. While it is completely naive to summarize a centuries long conflict into black and white absolutes after reading a few articles, I will do just that for you. In the 1600s, the English protestants looked across the English Channel and decided they wanted Ireland for their own. Since the northern part of the country was wealthier, they sent missionaries to convert the Catholics and settle the land. As you can imagine, the Catholics did not like this and many wars ensued. In 1795 The Orange Order was founded, committed to upholding the Protestant Values and staying true to Englishman William of Orange (why orange is the color of protesters, even today). In 1801 Ireland officially became part of the United Kingdom.
Native Irish people didn't like that at all and the fighting continued between the Nationalists who were mostly Catholic and wanted Ireland to be its own country, and the Unionists, mostly Protestants who though Ireland should remain part of the United Kingdom. In 1920 the country was officially divided into Southern Ireland that became The Republic of Ireland and Northern Ireland, which remained part of the United Kingdom.
The real problems started in the 70s with the formation of the Provisional Irish Republican Army. The IRA had traditionally been non-violent; the new IRA relished in violence. There were bombings, killings, shootings. 1972 was a particularly bad year. You have probably heard of Bloody Sunday, made famous by U2. That is when 26 non-armed civil rights protesters were killed. Bloody Friday, a day when 22 bombs were detonated in Belfast in just over an hour's time, also took place in 1972. In that one year over 500 people died, most of them civilians. Over the next 35 years there were more bombings, peace treaties, shootings, hunger strikes and over 3500 people died. Walls were built between the Catholics and the Protestants. Check points and searches were customary just to get around the city.
There has been relative peace since 2009 when major leaders announced they were going to try to settle matters peacefully, the borders have been removed and for the most part Belfast and Northern Ireland is a safe place to go. I say for the most part because as recently as July 12, 2012, there have still been riots. The Orange Volunteers still do parades and are still banned in some parts of the country. Peace is tenuous at best. We were there on the 40th anniversary of Bloody Friday and protests and parades were planned, with orange being the color of the day.
So I rode into Belfast on the train expecting to see destruction, armies or at least some indication of their history. I was quite surprised with what I found.
Belfast is a large city, industrial in parts, but quite lovely with an amazing energy about it. Out first stop was the Titanic Museum. My parents were Titanic buffs, so I knew a lot of the history. Since the ship was built in Belfast,the museum really went into how the actual ship was built. The museum included a ride, interactive displays and life size models of the various class rooms. I was most interested in the after effects of the sinking; the story of the boat and the men who had to recover the bodies from the ocean (only 1 in 5 bodies was ever found), catalog them and try to identify them. A lot of time was taken on the legal ramifications, the changes to ship safety and the impact on procedures. It was quite a neat tour.
We left there and headed to St. George's Market, a local farmer's market with artists, craftsmen and lots of food. There was fresh fish, every type of food you'd want (even over sized, fattening American food at Fat Daddy's). There was a jazz band playing in the middle and we wandered around for hours, sampling cookies, cakes, peanut brittle and buying jewelry and gifts. This was our slice of life tour, as we sat and ate lunch we noticed we were the only Americans to be seen. We were living how people in Belfast live, going to the market for Saturday, meeting friends, grabbing a bite to eat. It was fantastic people watching for sure.
We left St. George's and wandered the streets looking for cool architecture, which was everywhere. We went shopping, took pictures and even stopped in a Catholic church, meeting a sweet little old lady who was looking to go to Confession. She was from Belfast and asked where we were from. When we said North Carolina, she said "Raleigh." No, we said. We are from Charlotte. She shook her head "Raleigh is the capital. I know all the capitals of the United States." Again I was struck with how ignorant we are as a country.
We hopped back on the train and headed back to Portrush. I wished I could have spent more time in Belfast and might try to take a trip back there one day. The history, combined with the energy of the country is very compelling to me. Everyone we spoke with was quite nice and the city itself is gorgeous. The Capital building has the huge grassy area and people were picnicking, playing Frisbee and a huge TV was set up for people to watch the Olympics. Belfast is very much part of Great Britain and Olympic Rings were everywhere, sometimes next to names of ships built along the docks. The currency is in pounds, accents are sharper, more Scottish, and the feeling is overwhelmingly British. The city has FANTASTICALLY huge bike lanes, is very walker friendly and had musicians on almost every corner. Belfast was the opposite of the quiet farm community we had spent the first part of the week at, but it still was an amazingly comfortable city. It felt like a safe place to be anonymous, and that is something that appeals to me for some reason.
So I didn't see bombings and nothing BAD happened to me. I'm not so sure that the war is over and while I sympathize with the Nationalists, there is a point where you are killing your neighbors and families and you just need to get on board with the change. Again, easy for me to say. I do think it is interesting to read how much The Troubles have affected Northern Ireland as a society. Suicide rates are higher, sexual promiscuity is high with STDs being higher in NI than anywhere else. Alcoholism rates are higher and there is a general lack of trust. But even with that I am intrigued by Belfast, feel an odd sense of wanting to know more, to see more, to feel more of it. Maybe it is just the change to see history made real, maybe it is something else. I was very aware of my religious upbringing in the city and that made me feel connected in a way that makes no rational sense.
If you get the chance to go to Belfast, go! It is being touted as the next "must see" city and the local government has gone to great lengths to revitalize the entire area. It's worked, and I must admit I have a wee bit of a crush on Belfast.
So on our way to Northern Ireland, I read up on the issue. While it is completely naive to summarize a centuries long conflict into black and white absolutes after reading a few articles, I will do just that for you. In the 1600s, the English protestants looked across the English Channel and decided they wanted Ireland for their own. Since the northern part of the country was wealthier, they sent missionaries to convert the Catholics and settle the land. As you can imagine, the Catholics did not like this and many wars ensued. In 1795 The Orange Order was founded, committed to upholding the Protestant Values and staying true to Englishman William of Orange (why orange is the color of protesters, even today). In 1801 Ireland officially became part of the United Kingdom.
Native Irish people didn't like that at all and the fighting continued between the Nationalists who were mostly Catholic and wanted Ireland to be its own country, and the Unionists, mostly Protestants who though Ireland should remain part of the United Kingdom. In 1920 the country was officially divided into Southern Ireland that became The Republic of Ireland and Northern Ireland, which remained part of the United Kingdom.
The real problems started in the 70s with the formation of the Provisional Irish Republican Army. The IRA had traditionally been non-violent; the new IRA relished in violence. There were bombings, killings, shootings. 1972 was a particularly bad year. You have probably heard of Bloody Sunday, made famous by U2. That is when 26 non-armed civil rights protesters were killed. Bloody Friday, a day when 22 bombs were detonated in Belfast in just over an hour's time, also took place in 1972. In that one year over 500 people died, most of them civilians. Over the next 35 years there were more bombings, peace treaties, shootings, hunger strikes and over 3500 people died. Walls were built between the Catholics and the Protestants. Check points and searches were customary just to get around the city.
There has been relative peace since 2009 when major leaders announced they were going to try to settle matters peacefully, the borders have been removed and for the most part Belfast and Northern Ireland is a safe place to go. I say for the most part because as recently as July 12, 2012, there have still been riots. The Orange Volunteers still do parades and are still banned in some parts of the country. Peace is tenuous at best. We were there on the 40th anniversary of Bloody Friday and protests and parades were planned, with orange being the color of the day.
So I rode into Belfast on the train expecting to see destruction, armies or at least some indication of their history. I was quite surprised with what I found.
Belfast is a large city, industrial in parts, but quite lovely with an amazing energy about it. Out first stop was the Titanic Museum. My parents were Titanic buffs, so I knew a lot of the history. Since the ship was built in Belfast,the museum really went into how the actual ship was built. The museum included a ride, interactive displays and life size models of the various class rooms. I was most interested in the after effects of the sinking; the story of the boat and the men who had to recover the bodies from the ocean (only 1 in 5 bodies was ever found), catalog them and try to identify them. A lot of time was taken on the legal ramifications, the changes to ship safety and the impact on procedures. It was quite a neat tour. 
We left there and headed to St. George's Market, a local farmer's market with artists, craftsmen and lots of food. There was fresh fish, every type of food you'd want (even over sized, fattening American food at Fat Daddy's). There was a jazz band playing in the middle and we wandered around for hours, sampling cookies, cakes, peanut brittle and buying jewelry and gifts. This was our slice of life tour, as we sat and ate lunch we noticed we were the only Americans to be seen. We were living how people in Belfast live, going to the market for Saturday, meeting friends, grabbing a bite to eat. It was fantastic people watching for sure. 
We left St. George's and wandered the streets looking for cool architecture, which was everywhere. We went shopping, took pictures and even stopped in a Catholic church, meeting a sweet little old lady who was looking to go to Confession. She was from Belfast and asked where we were from. When we said North Carolina, she said "Raleigh." No, we said. We are from Charlotte. She shook her head "Raleigh is the capital. I know all the capitals of the United States." Again I was struck with how ignorant we are as a country. 
We hopped back on the train and headed back to Portrush. I wished I could have spent more time in Belfast and might try to take a trip back there one day. The history, combined with the energy of the country is very compelling to me. Everyone we spoke with was quite nice and the city itself is gorgeous. The Capital building has the huge grassy area and people were picnicking, playing Frisbee and a huge TV was set up for people to watch the Olympics. Belfast is very much part of Great Britain and Olympic Rings were everywhere, sometimes next to names of ships built along the docks. The currency is in pounds, accents are sharper, more Scottish, and the feeling is overwhelmingly British. The city has FANTASTICALLY huge bike lanes, is very walker friendly and had musicians on almost every corner. Belfast was the opposite of the quiet farm community we had spent the first part of the week at, but it still was an amazingly comfortable city. It felt like a safe place to be anonymous, and that is something that appeals to me for some reason.
So I didn't see bombings and nothing BAD happened to me. I'm not so sure that the war is over and while I sympathize with the Nationalists, there is a point where you are killing your neighbors and families and you just need to get on board with the change. Again, easy for me to say. I do think it is interesting to read how much The Troubles have affected Northern Ireland as a society. Suicide rates are higher, sexual promiscuity is high with STDs being higher in NI than anywhere else. Alcoholism rates are higher and there is a general lack of trust. But even with that I am intrigued by Belfast, feel an odd sense of wanting to know more, to see more, to feel more of it. Maybe it is just the change to see history made real, maybe it is something else. I was very aware of my religious upbringing in the city and that made me feel connected in a way that makes no rational sense. If you get the chance to go to Belfast, go! It is being touted as the next "must see" city and the local government has gone to great lengths to revitalize the entire area. It's worked, and I must admit I have a wee bit of a crush on Belfast.
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