My triathlon is tomorrow. Yikes. I am amazingly, surprisingly nervous and I really don't know why. I have trained for this since April. I did the mock tri two weeks ago and finished feeling strong and good. Yet I still feel nervous. I am almost finished packing up my bucket that Joe lovingly decorated and strapped. I am on my 6th powerade and about to have pasta and chicken for dinner. I know I am prepared...now I just need to perform.
The past two weeks have not been very active for training. I did the mock tri on the 12th and did well. The swimming was faster and easier than I thought and my time was 1:59, which actually places me in the top quarter of the 1000 person race (double yikes). The bike ride was OK with the exception of the last hill which was brutal. I got to the top and threw up. I am a puker so it didn't surprise me, but everyone came around like I had lost a leg. It took me longer to get my legs feeling normal after the ride, but I did a walk/run timed on my watch and finished strong. I got home that day and felt great, woke up the next morning hardly feeling tight. Monday I got up to go swimming feeling pretty damn proud of myself, got in the water and WOW. It took me 2 minutes to do one lap!!! My mom was also tired too so we cut our workout short and took a few days off to recover. Lesson learned.
I had Miller last weekend and it rained so I didn't do anything. This past week we stopped working out on Wednesday to conserve energy. All combined, I feel a little undertrained. I am hoping muscle memory does its job!
Friday morning I kinda freaked out. Seeing the swim times somehow made it way too real. But throughout the day I realized what an amazing support system I have and it took all my worries away. My mentor called me and reassured me that I am more trained that half the people there. My best friend Margaret sent me an Edible Delights fruit bouquet because she will be out of town. She talked to me for about an hour, calming me down and acting significantly impressed when I told her my 1:59 swim time. I didn't have the heart to tell her Michael Phelps time for the same distance is :48 seconds! My co workers hugged and high fived me, offering tips from their marathon or latest run, all telling me they know I can finish strong. Shelia and Adrienne are coming and Sandy and Miller are going to try. I got countless emails, e-cards and calls wishing me luck and I can't tell you the difference that makes. Jen Gaddy just emailed me and asked how she can support me and I am writing back - you just did. Just offering put a smile on my face.
As I have written this I finished my race bucket and have attached my race numbers (and gone to the bathroom 8 million times - hydration is a bitch). I am up too late but somehow I feel excited. Tomorrow at this time I will be a triathlete. A year ago there is NO WAY I would have ever imagined it was a possibility. Now I am looking at longer distances and thinking - I can do that. Biking 25 miles in Asheville? No problem.
My training group has a poem from Nike circa 1991 they read frequently. I have heard it several times now and never really thought it applied that much. I realized that this poem does pertain to me...but the "they" and "them" are actually me; my negative self talk, my negative feelings. So I read it again tonight with that perspective and it made a difference and really meant something to me. Here 's to ME for becoming a triathlete!
All your life
You are told the things
You cannot do.
All your life they will say
You're not good enough
Or strong enough
Or talented enough.
They'll say you are the wrong height
Or the wrong weight
Or the wrong type to
Play this or be this or achieve this.
THEY WILL TELL YOU NO,
A thousand times no
Until all the No's become meaningless.
All your life they will tell you no,
Quite firmly and very quickly,
They will tell you no.
And you...
YOU will tell them....YES!!!!
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